Saturday, June 13, 2009

#30 Combined Summer Services

White Christians love to attend church on Sunday mornings - they get to hear scripture broken down into the original Hebrew or Greek, they can wear casual attire, and don't forget fellowship with other believers over coffee following the service. There's no place the white Christian would rather be... unless it is nice outside.

During the summer months, hardly a white Christian can be found in church - if you are looking for one, head to the beach or the park. As a result, churches will combine the traditional and contemporary services into one so the white Christians without lake houses can gather in a half empty sanctuary instead of one that is three quarters empty.

A great feature of the combined service is a start time of around 10 am. Normally, white Christians must choose between a service that starts too early and one that starts too late. However, the combined service can lead to conflict, as white Christians may be appalled to find someone who usually attends the other service sitting in their pew. In addition, since white Christian church members have no contact with members that attend the other service, they don't know how to differentiate between other members and visitors. This makes greeting difficult, as white Christians feel compelled to aggressively welcome visitors, but don't want to embarrass themselves by trying to escort an elder to the information kiosk.

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3 comments:

Paul Wilkinson said...

In my part of the world we talk about a "cottage mentality." You're said to be "at the cottage," even if you've never owned a summer cottage in your life.

Everyone magically reappears at church after Labor Day weekend.

Lisa-Anne said...

That's awesome!!!

Anonymous said...

"...and don't forget fellowship with other believers over coffee following the service."
Or even DURING the service...after all, nothing really important going on here, right?